the why and wherefore i'm alive

i'm back. but i think that's enough of pretty women on my blog for now. sorry justin xP

i was in a brilliant mood just a few hours ago despite the aches from a whole day's training yesterday. that is until i read some stuff that has left me melancholic and feeling like i've been letting people down.

speaking of which, i've really let myself down for the exams that have just passed. i didn't put in enough effort and with that cause, i kinda know the imminent effect. disappointing end to secondary school life really. this whole year has been a real letdown to be honest. moments of temporal joy, but nothing achieved, nothing improved upon. i consider it a failure.

i enjoy solitude. yet something inside me is just constantly screaming out for attention. i find it sick really. and i dunno how i can change that.

the world is but a stage
where every man must play a part
and mine a sad one.